I can remember when my Grand-dad was alive, days when people were accountable. When family members cared for one another. These were the times when you could call your Aunt (mommy) and your uncle (dad). Even if you didn't come right out and say this, you knew in your heart, they loved you. Yesterday love meant something. People would make sure you were on the right track with your thoughts,your dreams, your actions. Those were the days when people had a conscious. Wouldn't dare do something so negative that it caused the death of another's spirit. (Well, of cause there were always the few who didn't give a hoot how you felt). They'd cut you down with words that would kill a mountain lion, and never blink an eye.Not writing about them.) They're still alive and doing well to this day. No, I'm speaking about people who never question the responsibility given to 'love one another'.
Grandparents are gone now. Aunts and Uncles have passed away also, leaving a younger generation of family members who could care less whether or not you lived or died. Case in point. I had a dear cousin who passed away while she was yet in her 30's. To this day I have not heard from any of her sisters or brothers. Nothing. Yes, I have tried repeatedly to reach them, only to meet up with answering services on their phone. Sent flowers and card, still no response. I know, they may still be grieving. Problem is, they will not communicate. The day of depending on the older generation to do the hard work, is over. It is time for us,who are left here,to live a more civilized life, and start reaching out to one another. Personally, I would be fearful of hiding from family members at a time when we all need to be drawing closer together. I could be wrong, but they all seem to be content in sticking with whatever crumbs (relationships) are physically near.
Well, somehow I must have fell through the cracks. Somehow I managed to grow older with a heart that still truly cares, truly loves, truly feels. There is nothing special about me. I probably stand out, only because the others have chosen to hide themselves. My heart still looks out and sees how wonderful it is to love others. Oh, some would never know this if they ever got in the way when I felt I was being pushed around. But aside from that, for some reason, I still dream of some utopia of life where two people really do love one another. Aare really meant for one another. Today I must confess this is all a joke, and the joke seems to have been played on me. And still the dream remains constant. Well, at least I woke up. May not like it, but I know that this thing they call love for one another (speaking about couples), is a total misnomer. As much as I dislike admitting it, the truth is, when you have missed your boat, don't go looking for another one. USE SOME OTHER FORM OF TRANSPORTATION. (smile) Take a deep breath and let the One Who knows you best take charge. Now that is where real Hope begins. It begins at the spot where you die to self, witness your own burial with lost dreams, ambitions, and false hope.
Closing, until next time. Chow!
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